As my first blog post, I feel it appropriate to explore the journey that has led to this moment of opening up my own private practice. While combining alcohol with winning-the-lottery conversations isn’t the most standard of origin stories, what can I say? I prefer to not be so standard.
Being a therapist is most certainly not my first career. When I moved to New York City nearly twenty years ago, I was certain that I was going to be a musical theatre star on Broadway. Needless to say, that did not pan out as planned, and I found myself focusing more and more on my work in restaurants. I was first a server, then a bartender, and then, when I turned 30 and realized that I wanted more direction, a restaurant manager. It was during this brief career choice that I met my husband (a lowly server – how taboo!), and life began to take off. He encouraged me to leave my miserable job and return to bartending, and go back to school to finish my degree (much to my mother’s frustration, as she had been bugging me… ahem, urging me to do this for about ten years). This brings us to the previously mentioned conversation mixed with alcohol.
On that fateful evening, over cocktails at our favorite cocktail bar, my husband asked me, “What would you do if we won the lottery?” To both of our surprise, the answer that emerged from my lips was: “I’d go to grad school and become a therapist!” I had spent over a decade mentally wrestling with what I wanted to do with my life, and apparently all it took was a well made Aviation (a delicious gin cocktail – worth looking up!) and a perfectly timed question.
And so it began.
As I look back on the long and wandering path that lead me here, I realize that while it would have been lovely to have figured this out a bit sooner, it is exactly the journey that deserves the credit for molding me into the therapist that I am now. My background in acting (as well as childhood stuff, but we can get into that later) prepared me for the introspection and analysis integral to the therapy process. My background as a restaurant server and bartender not only provided the skills to assuage even the most challenging of clientele but polished the ease with which I interact with others. It was literally my job to make people feel comfortable – super helpful for my current role! All of this being said, it also highlights the value of journey. I find that I have always tended to focus on the end goal over the current progress, but it truly IS the journey over the destination that allows for the success. If only someone wise had mentioned that…
And I DO feel successful. I am just at the beginning of my career, but each individual with whom I connect offers me so much more learning and growing with each step of the way. My job is to help guide them, but they also guide me. Our roles in each others’ lives are reciprocal, and while my focus is on their individual journeys, my own is deeply enriched through the process. I am grateful to my clients for we are in this together, figuring out our places in the world. Together.
